moments to share, moments to care
break up sum up
quite a long time has passed so i can finally write down the objective conclusions of a shitty experience.
i was spending a lot of time pitying myself for my childhood traumas, now i take a step back and see how much pain and suffering is there in people all around me. finally, instead of focusing on my own bruises, i can actually be a better friend and focus on listening more than talking.
i was living in a fantasy world. not regarding my values, those ones have only strengthened, but my expectations of relationship. i was expecting a story, a fairy tale, a miracle. and resented everything that wasn't as "perfect" as my imaginary world. including myself. now i can see that relationships just like friendships are based on respect, common interests and sense of humor, not mutual games, manipulation, tricks and treats.
and yes, the values. more than ever i am sure that my moral compass works just fine. it is worth to be a genuinely good person. there are plenty of us out there (i'm saying, hoping to be one of them). i have the best friends in the world, and finally i will show them the appreciation they deserve instead of taking it for granted.
i still love my life.
just a little different now.
Skrivet av arlona, 2015-08-15 00:48