moments to share, moments to care
step #1 -
every day understand and point out things that i am powerless of. things i cannot control.
this brought me closer to the serenity prayer.
at first it seemed plain, i cannot control other people, environment, and my own emotions. it became a lot more interesting when this became a practical task.
i realized there is no need for disappointment, anger, sadness, because a lot of things - a friend being late, a colleague being sloppy, a long line at the store, dog having pooped on the floor, me being in a bad mood after waking up - all of them were outside my control so there was no need for expressing the unpleasant feelings i might feel about these things.
sometimes i was powerless of my dysfunctional thinking. sometimes i was powerless of my disposition to alcohol, food, cigarettes, emotional addiction - however i could control my actions and how i behave, if i give in to these temptations or not.
i learned not to force, control, restrict myself. i'm rather feeling to what my body wants and why. is it a dysfunctional craving? am i scared, worried, tired? has it anything to do with reality? can i control it?
feeling and understanding myself honestly has been a blessing, it has helped me treating myself with greater love and care instead of pressure.
it is also easier to let go of things that i can't control.
Skrivet av arlona, 2018-06-11 08:23