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moments to share, moments to care

it has been way worse. way worse.

but this time, i'm not alone.

and i can't thank heaven enough.

Skrivet av arlona, 2010-05-12

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so i'm boiling over a lost cause, or more like no cause at all. and then i decide to read the lyrics of song i've grown fond of lately, because of the amazing composition of the bases, drums, male solo and boy choir.

and yes, i hate putting lyrics into the blog but here it is, right in my face:
"Ever want to just stop?
Do you want to surrender?
Or fight for victory?

Here we are at the start
I can feel the beating of our hearts

Darkness falls here comes the rain
To wash away the past and the names"

oh, did i mention i'm awesome? :)

Skrivet av arlona, 2010-05-10

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we never ask our best friends about their other friends. we never ask our collage best buddy with whom we have been through thick an thin about his/hers BFF in high school regardless of the gender. we just live and enjoy one day at the time.

so please tell me, why the fuck do we pull this shit in relationships?
why do ppl have the OCD to dig out every single detail about the exes in order to make the relationship a one big fat competition about who is better.

leave it the fuck alone. it's here and now you're living.
there is a reason.

and remember, it's not about if you win or lose. it's how you play the game.

Skrivet av arlona, 2010-05-06

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even though i'm on cloud nine, the feelings keeping me there are not solving my real-time problems.

i'm still stuck and i still suck.
time is running out, decisions are to be made and it's not about wrong or right, it's just that everything is happening too fast and the solid ground underneath my teeny tiny feet is vanishing in an instant.

not scared, no. what bigger shit could possibly happen to me than it already has? that's right, didn't think so. i just need my gray day, rain, depressive music and an afternoon and/or night in between my sheets feeling sorry for myself.

Skrivet av arlona, 2010-05-05

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i realized something.

i just hope that it really turns out that way.

Skrivet av arlona, 2010-05-05

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watching a sitcom. a character is sitting and asking herself rhetorically: how many ppl have i hurt?

how many have i..?

how many have you..?

Skrivet av arlona, 2010-05-02

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i suck

Skrivet av arlona, 2010-05-02

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i own a nice box, where i put my old toys.

nice, funny, weird and for the time being, interesting creatures that i enjoyed to play with at some time. things that i imagine to be alive but time opens my eyes and i realize they're just toys.

little girls grow up, either losing interest or braking the toys eventually.
or they just have disappointed the girl's imagination.

my toys? he, one that i would't call a toy, really. not anymore. maybe because for a long tong time haven't felt like playing with it anymore. it's ripped off arm and leg makes me feel more sorry for it rather than make me wanna play with it.

the other one, newest in my collection, became mine accidentally. not a bad accident, huh?
i grew fond of it, but there was a problem at the beginning. the doll had an age limitation. you know like the sigh "not for kids under the age of 3"? somewhat like that. but its ok. i reached up to the level.

another one, oh, is the oldest one i own (i guess you never forget your first one,...

Skrivet av arlona, 2010-04-30

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